Frankfurt was raining when I arrived, but two gloriously bright days followed.

Dell and the hotel are located on an industrial estate 20 minutes walk from each other, but bizarrelly scattered here and there between factories and offices are little detached houses.  Looks very strange.

The hotel has its restaurant in the basement.  On Wednesday I had a passable Hungarian-style steak.  But they couldn’t put it on my room.  I had to nip up to the room and get cash.  Very odd.  Thursday I sat down and the waiter explained that they were not cooking, only drinks were available.  Of course, he explained all this in German, so it took a little while to sink in.  So it was off almost as far back to Dell to a tiny Chinese restaurant I had spotted.

The first day I greeted the class.  "Gutten morgan, meinen Herren".

"Sprechen sie Deutsch?"

"Ich kann sprecht ‘gutten morgan’, ‘Ich kan nicht Deutsch sprekken’ unt ‘Wollen sie mit mir flirten?’"

With that I got my lipstick-looking lip balm out and moistened my chapped lips.  The guys all pushed their chairs a little further form me.

On Friday I arrived four hours early for my flight.  No, they couldn’t get me on an earlier flight with the class of ticket I had.  So I put my bag through the x-ray, walked through the beep-beep machine and sat in duty free with a paperback book.  An hour before take-off I went to the gate.  Bag through another x-ray machine and then a thorough frisking.  As I picked up my stuff I realised that I had left my unfinished book in the loo.  I retrieved it, and then went through the frisking again.  I told the security guy I had enjoyed it so much I came round for a second time.  Then I put my lip balm on.  Security guys don’t have much of a sense of humour.

Back home just before midnight.  Oh, nothing beats your own bed.


About snodlander
Snodlander is the nom de plume of Bob Simms. He is an IT trainer, but it's not as glamourous as it sounds. When he's not enthralling classes with adventures through SQL Server, he writes, draws and drinks his own home-brew. Buy his novel on Amazon Kindle at The Young Demon Keeper, It's 74p, for crying out loud!

One Response to Frankfurt

  1. Karla says:

    I kept hoping for some tale of trashing a hotel room…isn\’t that what you famous guys do on tour???Perhaps you and Dandy can swap tips – body wash vs. lip gloss…er lip balm 😀

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